Having a spouse who also meditates is quite nice. We have been together for 40 years, and our love for each other has grown for 40 years. We both started meditation about a year after we met, and Easwaran’s passage meditation about 10 years later. I give Sweetie Pie (Kathleen) and the eight-point program, all the credit for allowing our love together to grow and grow.
Meditation practice is very hard, but doing it together as the smallest satsang has made it doable for us. This is not to say that we can always meditate together. One of us is early to rise and early to bed. The other is not so early to rise. Our meditations usually overlap.
Now for the nitty gritty of living together for 35 years: we both work hard to slow down, be one-pointed and put others first throughout the day, every day. However, we each at times fall off this path. Thankfully, almost always we fall off one at a time. It is almost impossible to squabble with the one remaining on the path that is slowed down and one-pointed. Thank God there is almost always a peacemaker in the slowed-down, one-pointed, putting-others-first place.
Kathleen:I would add one very important aspect of supporting each other on the path that has worked well for us. The one who is still firmly on the path has never, ever said to the fallee — “Hey you’re off the path!” The quiet, unspoken total support that goes on during those tough times seems to be rooted in the practice of the eight points.
Another aspect of doing Easwaran’s meditation practice together is very dear to me. We have had the opportunity to introduce our three sons to Easwaran. They were blessed to meet him personally, but just as important, they have been in on our devotion to this practice from a very early age. Even if they are not using the practice now, I have great confidence that it has and will have a deep effect on their lives.